Back to the Grind

Hello, folks! I am home from Oregon, YAY! As much as I enjoyed my trip, I felt pretty relieved to be home. Well, I felt relieved until I realized that I had to start summer school, my internship, and return to my job. The anxiety everything looming as the end of my trip came nearer and nearer was too almost unbearable! Though, all of these commitments are because of my own doing, so I can't complain.

Yesterday was my first day of summer school. I am taking two businesses courses (BUS310/311), from 9-11:45. My classes are alright so far, but my professors are kind of...boring. I was anticipating work being hard yesterday because I heard there was a little bit of office drama during my absence, but there wasn't really anything out of place when I went back. However, I did feel as though I was going to faint multiple times...not sure why.

Today was my first day of my internship at Aflac! I will be a marketing intern, but due to my boss having a family issue, he wasn't able to come in. That meant that I just had to learn the rough basics from some other interns and will just have to return back next week when he's actually there.

Right now I have been having some stomach trouble :( Not sure if it's due to my self image anxiety or the fact that I have been eating a lot more than I should have when I was on vacation. Didn't really gain anything, but still...It's all in the head, right? Also, my trich has been pretty bad too :l

Oregon Reflection

As my trip to Oregon wraps up, I start to contemplate all that has happened since I have been here. I knew that leaving the University of Oregon to go back home for school would be tough, but it was a lot tougher than I had imagined. Starting my sophomore year in a school with a lot of familiar faces from high school was different. I definitely went into culture shock. I missed my old friends at Oregon, my freedom, the weather, everything. I was a miserable wreck. There was nothing I wanted more than to go back to Oregon.

Fast forward to the end of sophomore year, and dang was it challenging. It was a good kind of challenging. I started the year in tears and ended with a 4.0 (2 A's and 3 A+s, say whaaaaat). As much as I loved Oregon in my freshman year, I knew in my gut I was making the most sensible decision in coming back to Hawai'i. I have been blessed with so many great opportunities at UH.

I knew coming back would be different, but I didn't know it would be THIS different. Call it what you will, maybe "rosy retrospection"? Eugene, Oregon wasn't as magical as I had remembered it to be. Okay, I know calling Eugene, Oregon magical sounds silly, but when I first moved back to Hawai'i, that's how I saw it. In my head, my friends were the best people in the universe, the hobos were the best, everything was the best, that's what made me so depressed being stuck back on the rock I call home. 

However, after a lot of things went down that really tested me as a person, I realized how much I appreciate what I have at home. Sure, I may not like the weather, and may not hang out with my friends as much because I live at home, but my family really helped me. Sure call me lame, but my parents and my boyfriend are really my best friends. This was the first time I have traveled by myself since I moved back home, and it's been surprisingly lonely. I mean, I am not lonely when I am meeting up with my friends and reconnecting, but I have these moments where I just feel so isolated even if the room is filled. This is exactly how I felt at the beginning of the year at UH. So I am wondering, have I been gone from my friends' life for so long that I can't completely reconnect with them because I have missed out on so much? It's like reading the first chapter of a book and then skimming to the end and feeling confused. The dynamic of everyone's relationship is so different from the last time I came. Sometimes I feel like my friends and I are from different planets. Did I grow up? Or did they? Sometimes I feel like the only people I have in the world to trust are my parents and my boyfriend. I guess I am lucky to even have those three people.

I am enjoying my time back in Eugene, but at the same time I am using it to reflect. When I was struggling at home, I had it engrained in my mind that everything would be hunky-dory if only I could be with my friends back in Oregon. Now that I am back, I realize that is not the case. Hardships follow you, wherever you go and you just have to deal with it. Not like I am facing hardships while I am on vacation (because that would be silly), but I am just starting to see people without my eyes clouded. Being back, I see the faults of people again, reasons why they frustrated me before, things I had forgotten. 

Basically, this trip has taught me to appreciate what I have. There is no such thing as a perfect place, but as long as you have the people that make you feel like you aren't alone in a crowded room, any place becomes tolerable. Not sure if I am just getting hit with homesickness because I have become so attached to my parents and boyfriend, or if this is just a self realization "growing up" kind of thing. Basically, as cheesy as it sounds, home really is where the heart is.

Alton Baker Park

Since I have been back in Eugene, I knew on the one day of sunshine and happiness, I had to take a walk through Alton Baker Park. Alton Baker Park is a HUGE park with biking and running trails. It's actually really neat and very relaxing (and kind of dangerous at night, so yeah, just don't). There are a lot of beautiful plants and weird people just chilling on the banks of the Willamette River.  The reason why I love this bike trail is so much is because it fills me with so much nostalgia of when I use to be a student at the University of Oregon. Imagine walking through a forest and then all of a sudden you see this:

Autzen Stadium

 For those of you who don't know, this is Autzen Stadium, home of the Ducks football team. I spent pretty much every Saturday and Monday night of my fall term in this stadium because of marching band. As much as I loathed it at the time, I am really glad that I decided to stick with marching band. I was able to experience so many things, such as road trips, the Rose Bowl, and just the overall hype and energy directed towards the football team.

There are a lot of bridges in Alton Baker Park, almost to the point where I would get completely confused as to where I was. I enjoy going on the bridges and snapping photos of the beautiful Willamette River (which is apparently something you don't want to swim in).

Willamette River

While my friends were exploring the forests of Alton Baker Park, we found a big pond with geese everywhere. Now, I am not very fond of birds but I have to say the goslings were pretty cute. Well, cute until they all started chasing after us.

I love the nature of Oregon and how easy it is to just bike or run (not like I do either). Alton Baker Park in specific is huge and makes for a really nice stroll when the weather permits. This is something I  missed dearly about Oregon, the ability to just wander and lose yourself in nature.